Lest anyone finds Love too sugary, and Sex too sordid, for the month of July, we offer a dose of Reality. Gay men are notorious for living in an unreal world - insular, frivolous, hedonistic.. Our reality inspired subjects will be a mirror to reflect what most gay men, in their fervent pursuit of men, don't always see.

Search is ongoing, and we do welcome suggestions. Otherwise, bear with us, we will announce it in good time.

If you are a straight guy, by your mid 20's you would be looking for a serious girlfriend (never mind if you don't end up marrying just yet), because responsibility is always in your mind.

If you are a gay man, such action is unlikely. At 28, you leave your laundry to your mum and talk about what you would do when you grow up; you live in the fast lane while flaunting your youth, chop and change boyfriends while remaining firmly in the closet, and think financial planning is only for the insecure no-hopers (or spinsters)

20 years down the line when things have gone pear shape you sit down one day and wonder what you have achieved, where all your friends are, what would have happened if you had come out, and what you would do if you could be young all over again.

Then you remember what they always say:" Gay men don't grow up", and you ask yourself "Why not? Are gay men only born to party?"

No sooner has she lain down next to him she felt something stirring... her heart pounded with delight when she saw what was in full display before her... she could hardly believe a man so slight could carry something so significant, so burdensome, so downright heavy..

Grown-up literatures ( read trash) are full of such preoccupation that reflect the mind of our population at large and to this end, women and gay men share one thing in common - that they never fail to be impressed by size.

Does size matter? Is there such thing as an average? if so, by what benchmark? Can an oversized be a curse just as much as an undersized? Conversely, can an undersized be a blessing in disguise? Is the myth true that a slight man is invariably well endowed? Ultimately, is good sex always linked to a good size?

"In the West, I am just a grey, invisible old man. But in Asia, I can't take a 15 minutes ride on the train without being propositioned." So said a 60 years old Caucasian who lives in Kuala Lumpur. That Caucasian men are sought after in Asia is beyond doubt. But why?

Leaving aside his obvious (or is it just rumoured) physical attribute, is a Caucasian man more romantic? more moneyed? a better converse nationalist? or is he just plainly a better status symbol ( a.k.a. fashion accessory)?

30/7/2006 Rice and Race - Does love recognise skin colour?

"He is a potato Queen", says the sticky rice Queen sneeringly, clearly disapproving of the notion of a racial preference in favour of the West.

But the irony is that even among the sticky rice Queens there is an often rigid concept of racial preference (read prejudice). "I only do nasi lemak" is as cliché as " I rarely do roti canai". What double standard!